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  • 1. Facebook Status :Funny One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions :) I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice :) If time does not wait for you, don’t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life. If school has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking :) I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them :) All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips. Try to say the letter M without your lips touching. Excuse me …. Plesase, empty your pockets …. I think you stole my heart.
  • 2. Silence is the best answer of all questions and Smile is the best reaction in all situations. Unfortunately both never help in VIVA & INTERVIEW. I used to like my neighbours, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi :) I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat :) Newton’s law of love: Love can neither be created nor be destroyed. Only it can transfer from one girlfriend to another with some loss of money. Nothing moves faster than a girl untagging herself from an ugly picture :) The first five days after the weekend are always the toughest. I look at people sometimes and think ….. Really?? That’s the sperm that won :) Girls are funny creatures. They hate it when you ask their age but will kill you if you forget their birthday.
  • 3. How do people write an auto biography? I can barley remember what I had for lunch yesterday :) Nothing is illegal until you get caught :) Admit it, you listen to other strangers conversations and mentally give your opinion. Dear Google, thank you for doing most of my homework for me. :) Girls work on their looks but not their minds b’coz they know boys are stupid, not blind. The definition of a beautiful girl is one who loves me :) I hate when people all of a sudden decide to be funny when I am drinking something :) Only fools fall in love and I guess I’m one of them :) God made everything that has life, rest everything is made in China :) Friday is my second favorite F word.
  • 4. For all the girls that say ….. All guys are the same …… Who told you to try them ALL. Every girl deserves ONE GUY who looks at her every day like it’s the first time he saw her. And In that ONE GUY :) I think I got a fever, a fever of you :) I always give 100% at work: 13% Monday, 22% Tuesday, 26% Wednesday, 35% Thursday, 4% Friday :) Please GOD if you can’t make me slim, make my friends fat. For you men who think a woman’s place is in the kitchen, remember thats where the knives are kept. :) I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror. If a single teacher can’t teach all the subjects then how could you expect a single student to learn all subjects. Its better to fail than to cheat but its better to cheat than to repeat.
  • 5. Most emotional moment in a boys life, When a girl says, Can you give me your number :D Dear Google, Please stop behaving like a GIRL. Will u please allow me to complete the whole sentence before you start guessing &suggesting. Definition of human being: a creature that cuts trees, makes paper & write “SAVE TREES” on the same paper. Thanks to Google, Wikipedia, and whoever the hell invented copy and paste. Thank you Guys. I don’t believe that love comes to those who wait. Today love comes to those who flirt. LOLz Dear Food, Either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat :) It’s funny how people judge other’s mistakes while they also do the same thing. I always learn from mistakes of others, who took my advice :)
  • 6. The question I have not been able to answer is “What… does a woman want?” Boys will be boys as long as there are no girls in the picture. If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down & kill it. Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X, she’s not coming back. People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche. You actually have friends? Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD. Marriage is like going to a restaurant and order your choice from the menu, And then look at neighbouring table n wish you’d ordered that.
  • 7. Quit your job, buy a ticket, get a train, fall in love and never return. My name is I. My problem is love. My solution is you. If you wish to avoid seeing a fool, you must break your mirror :D The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad. Caution, Blind Man Driving. Milk does the body good but DAMN how much did you drink? If life gives you questions, Google gives you answers. The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education. Boys think of girls like books; if the cover doesn’t catch their eyes, they won’t even bother to read what’s inside.