Relationships and Dealing with Difficult People

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Nick Weeks, MSCSA Presidents’ Group Vice Chair & Thomas Berg

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Relationships and Dealing with Difficult People

  1. 1. TheVerbal Judo Series
  2. 2.  Conflicts of personality are a primary factor of internal issues.  Presidents are the facilitators of disciplinary meetings (a time-consuming practice).  Understanding challenging personality types can curb issues before they happen.  The Sinister Six
  3. 3.  Fly into a rage at the drop of a hat  Unpredictable  Can act like tyrants when they don’t get their way  Can be abusive
  4. 4.  Separate them from the group  Allow them to vent their anger within reason  Set boundaries early  State your position, stay factual, stay cool
  5. 5.  Smarter than you in their area of expertise  Commonly correct what you say  Quick to point out your flaws
  6. 6.  Know your facts  Capitalize on their knowledge by asking questions  Strategically place them on like assignments  Praise their work
  7. 7.  Use potshots & sarcasm to undermine you  Will fail to complete projects & blame you  Rarely ever takes the lead  Rarely ever contributes
  8. 8.  Keep issues fact-centered  If necessary, use open-ended questions to put the spotlight on them  Use the fear of open confrontation against them
  9. 9.  Focuses on the down side of every issue  Every idea is wrong  Every initiative will turn out badly
  10. 10.  Understand their perspective, but don’t endorse it  Stay factual  Don’t get drawn into an argument  Stay positive
  11. 11.  Super excited about everything  Volunteer for everything  Overcommit themselves
  12. 12.  Know their expertise  Limit what you ask of them  Affirm their contributions  Teach them to say no
  13. 13.  They watch everything but say nothing  Rarely socialize with the group  Unable to figure out motivations
  14. 14.  Draw them out with open ended questions  Be persistent, but patient  Look for non-verbal cues
  15. 15.  Know your triggers (mindfulness)  Bulls: Separate emotion from fact (cool down)  Geniuses: Teach, don’t preach  Sucker Punchers: Ask questions (honest assertiveness)  Downers: Focus on the good  Cheerleaders: Get others engaged  Ghosts: Get engaged!
  16. 16.  Thanks for playing!

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