TWO KEY QUESTIONS 10
NINE BALANCING PRINCIPLES 16
PATHWAY OF THE PROCESS 17
S(S)ELF ACCEPTANCE 28
DAILY AFFIRMATIONS 31
This booklet brieﬂy describes the essentials of a
new program for harmonious living . . . The Way Of
The Mangrove Seed.
The crux of this new “way” is the balancing of the
intuitive (S) and rational (s) aspects of our mind in
daily living. We need to learn to trust one, new
balanced S(s)elf. The booklet presents a path to
follow based on a unique, holistic model for S(s)elf
discovery and authentic expression.
The booklet also outlines a possible path for a
personally deﬁned “emergent spirituality.” The Way
offers a practical opportunity for every person to
live as a fully actualized individual, within the dual
context of their inner and outer worlds of reality.
It offers an integrated way to S(s)elf Realization !
The essentials of
The Way Of The Mangrove Seed are
• The process . . . a three phase developmental cycle
of trusting, releasing, and balancing.
• The pathway . . . to develop a balanced S(s)elf
incorporates a nine part program of movements
for developing a balanced lifestyle.
• The plan . . . for maintaining personal balance is
applied in six sectors of personal living . . .
emotional, spiritual, physical, social, mental, and
HOW TO USE THIS BOOKLET
Welcome. You’ve taken the ﬁrst step of what could
be the most rewarding journey of your life . . . the
journey of S(s)elf discovery and authentic
expression. This book can be your guide to explore
your personal beliefs, attitudes and behaviors.
Ultimately, you may discover your True Identity
deep within you.
Here are some suggestions to get you started.
1. Individually, read the entire book for an
overview. Then, focus your re-reading by the
• Attempt to initially deﬁne your answers to the
two major questions (pages 10-11)
• Examine the three strategic action imperatives for
personal daily living (pages 11-13) and reﬂect on
their meaning for your daily life
• Understand the nine structural principles (pages
16-17) for living an authentic life and grasp the
essential attitudes underlying the nine movements
2. The use of group discussion (referenced on page
14) is essential to the fullest development of your
authentic S(s)elf. The following ideas can help you
form small (fewer than 10) groups of serious, “like-
• Send out an invitation to friends or an
organization to which you belong announcing
the creation of a discussion group. You can
decide to conduct a “formal” discussion with
speciﬁed topics, format and rules or a “casual
conversation” in an open-ended, cafe-style
• Choose a regular time and place to meet weekly.
This frequency works well with busy
schedules, allowing for adaptive participation
within a ﬁxed meeting schedule, yet giving the
necessary continuity for group trust and
3. The “essentials” of The Way Of The Mangrove
Seed are grouped as a process, a pathway, and a
plan. After you have met several times as a group,
take time to focus your group attention on the
same three areas as you have done as individuals.
Let everyone participate in their own time, and on
their own terms. The key to effective group
dialogue is empathic and non-judgemental listening,
and participating only when you can add clarity
(intellectual and emotional) that augments the group
discussion. Remember, the group meetings are not
designed as therapy, although they may be
4. Continue the group meetings for as long you
may decide, discussing a different section of the
booklet each week. As you feel more comfortable
and trusting with each other, group dialogue may
trigger personal memories and feelings. We suggest
that you digress only minimally in order to give
others an opportunity to share “their story.” You
will never fully complete the topic under discussion
at one meeting.
Perhaps by consensus, additional time can be
devoted to special areas of group interest, as well
as the use of additional resources (internet, books, and
videos) The website of the Mangrove Seed
(www.mangroveseed.org) offers an extensive reading
list that can supplement the group discussion.
5. A suggested format for a one hour, general
group discussion is
15 Minutes Silent Meditation and Quieting Down
30 Minutes Group Discussion
15 Minutes Sharing Personal Thoughts/Feelings
The use of a facilitator is of critical importance for
each group discussion. You can select a person to
permanently ﬁll this role, or rotate on some
The key skills of the facilitator are the ability to
listen empathically to all voices, to non-judgementally
nudge the discussion along, and to dampen any
group conﬂict that may arise.
Remember, it’s all about communicating our deepest
thoughts and feelings and learning to trust that others will do
This booklet of “essentials” is only a primer. It is
further clariﬁed for adults in a more expanded
version entitled, THE WAY OF THE MANGROVE
SEED - Living A Balanced Lifestyle (ISBN 978 -0-9797158
-2-2). The book reﬂects the realizations of the
founder of The Mangrove Seed, Inc. that were
gleaned from his twenty-two year search for
personal meaning and identity.
Also, for children of all ages, MANGROVE SEED
CHRONICLES - Learning To Trust (ISBN 978 -0-9797158
-0-8) was written as a metaphor for the journey of
S(s)elf discovery. Through many animal characters
visited on the mangrove islands, the CHRONICLES
provide essential principles that parents, teachers
and grandparents may use for discussion with
The whole is in the seed.
The seed is the whole of what we want to know.
The seed is the center. The seed is the source.
Express yourself . . . doing so creates meaning!
Ask yourself each day . . .
what remains unexpressed within me?
All that is good and unique in you
should be brought out.
What is dark inside you, perhaps even evil,
must also be expressed in a proper way.
All growth comes with a shock.
When the seedling appears,
it carries with it the complete pattern for its growth.
After completion come new beginnings . . .
To gain strength . . . to renew the root.
Without a thorough grounding, there is no
harmony. Do not forget the root.
THE MANGROVE SEED WAY
OFFERS PERSONAL GROWTH
PLANTING A NEW SEED
Awakening To The Need For
A Balanced S(s)elf
GERMINATING THE SEED
Practicing The Nine Principles Of
SPROUTING THE SEED
Demonstrating The Habit Of
A NEW HOLISTIC PARADIGM FOR
LIVING A BALANCED LIFESTYLE
The Way Of The Mangrove Seed proposes the
following answers to traditional philosophical
inquiry about the meaning of life.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE HUMAN?
1. Authentic individual expression, unfettered by
guilt and shame, is the primary purpose of physical
2. The pathway to creative individual expression
requires a balanced S(s)elf realization that
simultaneously respects both the individual and all
3. Inner peace is demonstrated and maintained
through a balanced S(s)elf expression of both the
rational and intuitive aspects of our mind in outer
4. Social groupings function to proactively support
this expressive S(s)elf realization of their members.
5. Ethical interpersonal relationships among all
humans encourage the manifestation of individual
6. The growth of universal harmony, human and
otherwise, is essential for planetary survival; and, to
achieve this, all human behavior is guided by
the ethical imperative to “do no harm.”
WHAT IS LIFE REALLY ALL ABOUT?
Were we born to work? Or, do we work to live?
Our obsession for personal existence based on
survival through “working” fails to recognize the
essential purpose of human life . . . to follow a path of
continual S(s)elf development and authentic expression.
The Way Of The Mangrvove Seed proposes three
strategic action imperatives for personal daily
1. DISCOVERING YOUR
Many human behavioral lifestyles exist other than
the one into which a person is born and raised.
Each lifestyle has its own socially prescribed
structure of beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors that
reveals its core values.
No single lifestyle is inherently better or worse
than another; therefore, no lifestyle should be
exclusively preferred nor dominate over any other.
Personal tolerance of lifestyles other than one’s
own is essential to harmonious living.
Holistic education involves learning about the
variety of lifestyle possibilities and selecting one’s
personal preferences from among them.
The discovery of a personally empowered
S(s)elf is the focus of true educational programs.
A framework of responsibility and
accountability for the consequences of personal
choice/expression within a social context must also
be articulated and complement S(s)elf inquiry.
Pragmatic questioning and experiential testing
of differing lifestyles is the primary process for
childhood and adult education.
2. CHOOSING TO LIVE
Authentic daily living is making conscious choices,
based on personally chosen
lifestyle “truths and core values”
about all personal thoughts and actions.
Everything changes constantly in life. Birth and
death form the universal cycle of change. Eventual
physical death is the common reality for all living
organisms . . . death is our common bond.
When we embrace this reality of our mortality,
we can give ourselves permission to live a life
without constant fear and anxiety. Then, life can
become a unique opportunity to have a special and
sacred personal experience. We can also better
manage our multiple fears of death . . . physical,
emotional, spiritual, social, mental, and ﬁnancial.
Personal choices become more authentic when
we do not hide behind our fears of loss and death.
The “false masks” of thought and behavior that we
often present to others in our daily lives are
reﬂections of these conscious and unconscious
fears. Hiding behind them, we also become
vulnerable to potential manipulation by external
purveyors of anxiety, guilt, and fear.
There is a critical need to balance rational and
intuitive “knowing,” as well as emotional fear and
trust, in all personal decision making.
3. ENGAGING LIFE RESPONSIBLY
Personal authentic S(s)elf expression
is tolerant and supportive
of the attempt at authentic expression by all
people, even if it may be different from your own.
Personal choices and responses are encouraged
to be ﬂexible and adaptive to both the changes of
situational contexts in daily life, as well as to
possible modiﬁcations, over time, of personal
“truths and core values.”
No personal choice may cause the
“diminishment of the existence” (fully deﬁned as
physical, emotional, spiritual, mental, social, ﬁnancial
existence) of any other person or social group. The
sine qua non of personal caring and compassion is to
"do no harm!"
A cooperative ethic of interpersonal
relationships, based on honest “win-win” communication, is
essential for any bond of trust to exist in social
Interpersonal dialogue is a critical ingredient for
the empowerment of personal awareness. This
reﬂective, “mirroring back” process fosters
personal awakening and freedom from unconscious
social and cultural conditioning.
Discovery and healing of the inner S(s)elf is
vitally dependent upon the formation of trustful
relationships within a group context.
Commitment to a speciﬁc mutual support group is
critical to the personal development of honest S(s)elf
The recovery of inner peace in daily living
must manifest ﬁrst,
before outer worldly peace can be recaptured.
The journey to planetary peaceful living
is the continued attempt by all persons
to balance their inner S(s)elves
in everyday living.
When a person can trust and accept
their inner, balanced S(s)elf
as the basis for all human interaction,
they can eventually learn to trust others.
Indeed, all humans have an authentic S(s)elf
yearning to express . . . but only if they can trust!
Mangrove Seed, Inc.
FOR S(s)ELF BALANCING
Accept that my ability to personally control the
outcomes in life situations is illusory
Balance both aspects of my mind to discover my
Persevere in seeking personal Truth in spite of any
personal and social limitations
Challenge my resentments and fears that prevent
Continue to eliminate these impediments to my
search and expression of my Truth
Understand that others may react with a
dominating, fear-biased, rational mind
Continually review and repair all non-harmonious
Maintain my personal strength through special
S(s)elf nurturing practices
Encourage the S(s)elf development of others by my
genuine caring for them
PATHWAY OF THE PROCESS
The process of S(s)elf balancing and authentic
expression continues over a lifetime. The sequence
of change tends to follow a linear pattern of
development; however, the actual unfoldment is
often circular and simultaneously occurring.
The general movements of this process, as
guidelines for the levels of personal growth, are
indicated below. They incorporate and explain each
of the previous nine principles.
Together, these movements form the structural
backbone for a balanced lifestyle. They also provide
the necessary touchstones for the continual
reﬂection and personal change required to maintain
authentic S(s)elf expression.
PHASE 1 . . . LEARNING TO TRUST
Trusting a balanced inner S(s)elf
DESTROYING THE OLD SEED
Admit that my expectation to CONTROL
the outcomes in life situations and human
relationships is illusory
Accept that everything is "as it is,” and
represents all that I need to “deal with" in this
Embrace the understanding that life is a process
of unfolding ﬂow, changing all the time; and, that
fear and anxiety are caused by not trusting in this
ﬂow of uncertainty
CLAIMING A NEW SEED
Believe that a conscious connection with an
inner source of strength other than my rational, fear-
biased aspect of one’s mind is possible
Know that this intuitive, trust-biased aspect of
one’s mind is as powerful and accurate as the
Understand that a balanced use of both aspects
can provide me with COURAGE to discover my
personal Truth, enhance authentic S(s)elf
expression, and foster harmonious relationships in
my daily life
FERTILIZING THE SOIL
Persevere in seeking my personal Truth while
trusting that my choices can be more truthful when
I rely on the conscious use of both ”aspects” of
Consciously COMMIT to continually
integrate both aspects of my mind in all interpretations
and reactions to life situations
Trust that my decision to give my S(s)elf
recognition, acceptance, and validation will
empower me to live my authentic life
PHASE 2 . . . LEARNING TO RELEASE
Releasing dominant fear-biased mind control
PLANTING THE NEW SEED
Realize that when my resentments and fears
dictate my choices, my ability to trust is blocked
CRITIQUE these resentments and fears by
challenging their validity and applicability in a
current life situation
Review my core values periodically to re-afﬁrm
their alignment with my path of authentic S(s)elf
REMOVING THE ROCKS
Consciously choose to eliminate impediments
to balancing emotion and rationale
Continue to CLEAR away, without
reservation, any false beliefs, attitudes, feelings, and
behaviors that are based on fears and resentments
Realize that this process of conscious personal
examination and release will never be completely
WATERING AND WEEDING
Recognize that others struggle with their own
resentments and fears
Know that every person’s Truth is unique,
relative, and subject to change just like mine
Demonstrate COMPASSION for both
others and my S(s)elf when resentments and fears
enter into our communication
PHASE 3 . . . LEARNING TO BALANCE
Maintaining the new balanced S(s)elf
FEEDING THE ROOTS
Know that S(s)elf Balancing and authentic
expression are developed over time and at different
stages in life
Remember that there is no ﬁnal, full “S(s)elf
Realization” because, without proper due diligence,
the “wounds” caused by resentments and fears can
Conduct frequent examinations to CLARIFY
and repair any non-harmonious relationships in my
ANCHORING TO THE TAP ROOT
Take breaks often from fear-biased rational
thinking to re-balance my S(s)elf
Retreat from all unconscious and fear-based
activities that produce stress in my life
CONNECT regularly with a balanced
interpretation of my outer world through a regular
practice of conscious silence, contemplation, and
S(s)elf nurturing activities
BIRTHING NEW SEEDS
Realize that my S(s)elf development is
independent, yet organically interconnected with the
growth of others and the natural environment
Provide a fertile ground of supportive trust for
interpersonal collaboration, cooperation, and
Continue genuine CARING that offers
emotional support for everyone and empowers
authentic S(s)elf expression
The Mangrove Seed lifestyle balancing program
operates by the dynamic, interactive principle of
genuine caring . . . a reciprocal caring for each other.
If we are to live harmoniously on this planet, we
need to strive for authentic S(s)elf discovery and
expression through cooperative empowerment, not
The Way Of The Mangrove Seed
Deﬁnes Genuine Caring To Embody
Four Essential Ingredients
1. RESPECTFUL RECOGNITION
“I acknowledge your unique existence”
2. TOLERANT ACCEPTANCE
“I accept you totally as you are, in this moment”
3. NURTURING VALIDATION
“I support you fully to become who you want to be”
4. MUTUALLY BENEFITING
“I give my kindness to you with only a request
that you ”pass it on” to others
FOLLOWING THE WAY CREATES
THE HABIT OF S(s)ELF ACCEPTANCE
You are both the cause and the effect
of your life situations.
Your reaction, and its consequences,
to this created world
are solely your personal responsibility.
• Life always ﬂows with uncertainty. Its
currents and winds are beyond personal
control. Your reaction to this uncertainty is
fundamentally prompted by your fears, and
created by your rational mind (that wants
certainty and predictability for your survival).
• Other creatures also live with fears because
they also perceive life with uncertainty.
• Moreover, others are responsible for both
the choice and consequences of their
behavior in reaction to uncertainty as you are
responsible for your own.
• Any person has, within limits, a choice about
how to respond to external change and the
behavior of others. But, ﬁnding these
choices is often difﬁcult.
• When you feel disturbed, it is because you are
imbalanced within your S(s)elf. You may believe that
others cause your disturbance, but the cause is
really a skewed interpretation of their behavior
created by your fear-biased, rational mind.
• Your deep inner fears may often prompt a
projected, imbalanced perception of your
world. The rational aspect of your mind can
misinterpret the emotional encoding of the
intuitive aspect and cause incorrect
• When you want to judge and blame others
because of your inner imbalanced S(s)elf,
examine your own mind ﬁrst, not that of others.
Often, your own un-released fears and
resentments are the true cause of your
judgment and blame of others.
• Acceptance of your S(s)elf (and the same
acceptance of all other S(s)elves) is not an easy
path to follow in a world of uncertainty.
Balancing your fears with trust, and with
respectful non-judgment, requires continued
practice in every moment.
Anyone can learn to develop and maintain a “peaceful
coping consciousness” based on inner peace. When we learn
to accept life completely, as it unfolds in the present
moment, we become able to maintain inner balance and
enjoy our personal harmony.
Forgivingly, we must acknowledge that the function of the
human mind is to induce survival and evolution through
competitive interaction, often motivationally biased by fear.
Yet, we must accept the challenge to tame this dominant,
"well-intentioned beast" by developing our intuitive
“knowing” that allows personal fulﬁllment
through cooperative relationships.
The end of personal suffering occurs when we
learn to balance our true S(s)elf. Harmony results
when we consciously allow both aspects of our
mind . . . the rational and intuitive . . . to become
balanced in every choice/decision
we make in daily living.
In time, we can individually accept the unfolding of
life situations with less judgement.
We can live more from trust than fear . . .
from a space of inner peace rather than stress.
And, we can each enjoy fulﬁllment
within our S(s)elf,
even though other S(s)elves
may continue to struggle in a stressful world.
CHECKLIST OF DAILY AFFIRMATIONS
FOR FOLLOWING THE WAY
I can change my reaction to any life situation when I
realize the futility of my desire to control the
I can establish inner peace when I commit to develop
a balanced S(s)elf.
I can create harmonious relationships when I trust my
balanced S(s)elf as the source of my personal strength.
I can acquire peaceful beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors
when I question the truth of my resentments and
I can consciously choose to alter my perceptions of life
situations when I release these blocks to balanced
I can facilitate outer peace when I do not
thoughtlessly react to others when they behave with
an unbalanced and fear-biased mind.
I can create balanced interpersonal relationships when I
objectively review and accept personal
accountability for my part in their outcomes.
I can maintain both inner and outer peace when I
practice activities daily that balance my fear-biased,
rational mind with my trust-biased, intuitive mind.
I can contribute to harmonious living, within my
limitations, when I genuinely care for every person and
the planet, with a careful consideration of the future
consequences of all my actions.