Forgiveness –The Gift Rarely GivenLowenfield Alleyne
2 Timothy 2:24‐26 (KJV)24 And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient,25 In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth;26 And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.
2 Timothy 2:24‐26 (CEV)24 and God’s servants must not be troublemakers. They must be kind to everyone, and they must be good teachers and very patient.25 Be humble when you correct people who oppose you. Maybe God will lead them to turn to him and learn the truth. 26They have been trapped by the devil, and he makes them obey him, but God may help them escape.
What We Will CoverThe Offense Offenses & ExpectationsThe OffenderThe OffendedUnforgiveness Illustration Physical EffectsForgiveness Definition Value of…. Forgiving is Not…. Forgiving is….
OFFENSE The Greek word for offense is skandalon and it is defined as follows: properly, "the movable stick or tricker (`trigger) of a trap, trap‐stick; a trap, snare; any impediment placed in the way and causing one to stumble or fall" (a stumblingblock, occasion of stumbling): metaphorically, "any person or thing by which one is (`entrapped) drawn into error or sin“‐THAYERS GREEK LEXICON
Isaiah 8:14(KJV)14 And he shall be for a sanctuary; but for a stone of stumbling and for a rock of offence to both the houses of Israel, for a gin and for a snare to the inhabitants of Jerusalem.
Matthew 13:41(KJV)41The Son of man shall send forth his angels, and they shall gather out of his kingdom all things that offend, and them which do iniquity;
Offenses & ExpectationsThe closer the individual is to you the greater the offenseThe higher your expectation of an individual the greater the offense
The OffenderThe individual that has committed an offense.The one that is perceived to have committed an offence
The OffendedOffended persons fall into two categories:1. Those who have been treated unjustly2. Those who believe that they have been treated unjustly
ExerciseList (with 1 being the closest, and 5 being the most distant relationship)the names of five people who have offended you:1. ___________________________________________________2. ___________________________________________________3. ___________________________________________________4. ___________________________________________________5. ___________________________________________________
Unforgiveness Imprisons individualsSevers relationshipsWiden breachesHandicapsStunts growthHurts you
QuoteWhen you don’t forgive someone, in some way thatperson is in jail, and you are the warden. You’re incarcerated, too, because you have to make sure the prisoner stays there.—KERNEY FRANSTON
Unforgiveness a giant metaphorical hook you first, the offender next. you’re always carrying the hook and the offender. let the offender off the hook first.
The Bible & AngerJob 5:2 (KJV)2 For wrath killeth the foolish man, and envy slayeth the silly one.Job 18:4 (KJV)4 He teareth himself in his anger: shall the earth be forsaken for thee? and shall the rock be removed out of his place?
ExerciseThink about the person who is number one on your list. What emotion do you feel?__________________________How do you physically feel when you think about the person?__________________________
Physical Effects of Unforgiveness greater levels of anxiety and depression. at higher risk of cardiovascular disease and cancer.
Definition of Forgiveness non‐verbal concept Best defined through experience. dissolving negative feelings by use of compassion.
2 Corinthians 2:10 (KJV)10To whom ye forgive any thing, I forgive also: for if I forgave any thing, to whom I forgave it, for your sakes forgave I it in the person of Christ;
Value of Forgiveness liberates a person from intense and protracted suffering. secure and more optimistic place. enables people to forgive themselves. promotes higher self‐esteem, physical health, vitality and a happier life.
Forgiving is not… Just Forgetting Excusing Saying “what you did was ok” Pardoning Reconciliation Telling the offender “I forgive you”
Forgiving is a Gift It is a gift to oneself. It is a gift to the offender. The offender doesn’t need to know. It is given freely. It doesn’t depend on the offender being remorseful.
ExerciseWrite a prayer for all persons on your list, asking God for His help and wisdom.________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Quotations“Do I not destroy my enemy when I make him my friend?”‐ Lincoln“He who cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he himself must someday pass.”‐ Lloyd Herbert
Romans 12:20 (KJV)20Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.