Managing emotional intelligence

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From Learning Tree International's workshop at Showcase Ontario 2011. …

From Learning Tree International's workshop at Showcase Ontario 2011.
This presentation will introduce you to Emotional Intelligence & cover these 3 objectives:
Identify five emotional intelligences.
Leverage emotional intelligence to augment your personal leadership style.
Apply emotional intelligence in a management role.

More in: Business , Technology
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  • Give a quick introduction to MagnaLearn and AnyWare. One of the goals of this slide is to highlight MagnaLearn and AnyWare and perform a quick demo of AnyWare to ensure attendees understand and know how to use the key features of AnyWare (set status, chime in, chat, etc.).Have the attendees actually use the Chime In and Chat features at this point to make them feel more engaged.Mention that while we won’t be using the full functionality of AnyWare today, in a typical AnyWare class, on-line participants are able to do everything an in-class participant does:  Participate in classroom discussions Perform all hands-on exercises on the same equipment as in-class participantsParticipate in break-out sessionsGet individual help and advice from the instructor—immediately as needed—just as in the classroomLearning Tree AnyWare Program DescriptionLearning Tree AnyWare, our newest training delivery option, connects you to a classroom from your home or office.Using a Flash enabled Web browser and a high-speed internet connection, Learning Tree AnyWare enables you to: Participate and interact with your Instructor and peers via voice, video and chat features See these two presentation screens with annotations and highlighting See a live video image of the instructor presenting the course material Perform all the same hands-on exercises using internet access to remote control into one of the in-class workstationsLearning Tree AnyWare provides an innovative new way to participate online in our classes. For the demo point out the following items and quickly explain how they work:The two MagnaLearn Screens with real time annotationThe attendee list – mention the different status options and explain how to set the status. Ask all on-line attendees to set their status to Agree. Mention you can clear the status and then clear everyone's status. Chime in pod – ask an online attendee to press it to demonstrate the "chime"Ask the attendee to hold down the talk button and tell you something (i.e. where are they taking the class from) to demo we can hear them tooThe Chat pod – may want to ask participants to reserve that for offline help as you will not always see it when lecturingThe video pod provides some kinesthetic feedback of the instructor referring to a screen(if applicable) Mention instructor demos and switch into Demo mode to show how the Demo PC can be projected(if applicable) mention hands-on exercises using remote control of in-class workstations (links will be provided shortly)Tech support pod. If you’d like more information, please visit
  • Jogger text: Recognizing and Affirming Your EmotionsDirection: RightInstructor notes:Duration: 20 minutesPresentation Style: PresentationPresent:Have you ever arrived at work and cannot remember anything much about the journey?Do you sometimes forget whether you turned off the stove?Can you remember the details of the last conversation you had with your loved ones?Without actually introducing it as an activity go through this quick mindfulness exercise – using an set up suggesting you ‘just want to make sure they all appreciate the point about focusing the here and now.’ (the reason for not raising it to ‘formal’ activity status is that some people are resistant to this kind of mindfulness activity if it is introduced as such – it sounds a bit 70’s and hippyish to many people today)InstructionsSay to the class: Just let’s stop for a moment. Pay attention to the room we are in. Notice the temperature. What is the air like? Is it still or moving? How does it smell?Notice the chair you’re sitting onIs it hard or soft? Comfortable or not?What about its height? Notice your bodyDo you have any aches or pains? What about itches? Are your muscles relaxed or tight?Are you hungry or thirsty?Do you need the bathroom?Then remind them that these are things that go on all the time but we just don’t focus on themYet they do have an influence on how we experience the world – even though we are not paying attentionThen highlight that many aspects of our emotional lives are not attended to either - the first step toward mastery is to become aware
  • Jogger text: The Importance of InterpretationDirection: RightInstructor notes:Duration:Presentation Style:Present:Introduce the concept that how we think is a major determinant of our emotional experienceThe left “flash” called “reaction” is about how previous learning and experience causes us to automatically interpret situations and respond to them emotionally – this usually happens without our awarenessNOTE: IT IS CRUCIAL STUDENTS RECOGNIZE THAT EVEN WHEN OUR REACTIONS ARE THE RESULT OF PAST EXPERIENCE (E.G. ,THEY ARE LOST TO CONSCIOUSNESS) IT IS HOW WE THINK ABOUT THAT EXPERIENCE THAT IS IMPORTANT NOT THE EXPERIENCE ITSELF. THEREFORE SELF AWARENESS IN THE MOMENT IS AT THE HEART OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE!The right hand “flash” called “response” is about how we interpret the current situation consciously once we have experienced the emotion – and decide how to respond and what to do. How we think about the situation enables us to choose how to RESPOND in a way that is more usefulTHEREFORE SELF-MANAGEMENT—HAVING CONSCIOUS CONTROL OVER HOW WE RESPOND—IS ANOTHER KEY EMOTIONAL COMPETENCE
  • Jogger text: Taking Care of YourselfDirection: BothInstructor notes:Duration: 3 minutesPresentation Style: GeneralPresent:Run through the centering exercise – it’s a useful mindfulness technique too as well as buying time to allow the emotion to blow throughThere are so many stress/anxiety reduction techniques out there we don’t have space to do them here and different people find different techniques helpfulIf time permits run through this quick breathing technique that can be adopted in any situation to reduce emotional reactionAdjust your posture (standing or sitting) so you are comfortableClose your mouthPlace one hand flat over your navelBreath in slowly through you nose counting to 8Take the breath down deep so the hand flat on your navel moves outwardsHold the breath for a count of 3Breath out slowly and steadily for a count of 8Repeat this 5 times
  • After this slide, Polls 7 and 8 should be displayed.Poll 7 (to be displayed with Poll 8):What is your overall impression of the Learning Tree AnyWare online delivery system?ExcellentGoodNeutralPoorNo Vote Poll 8:What is your overall impression of your Learning Tree instructor?ExcellentGoodNeutralPoorNo Vote


  • 1. Managing Emotional Intelligence
  • 2. Session Objectives
    Introduce you to Learning Tree International
    Introduce you to Emotional Intelligence
    Identify five emotional intelligences
    Leverage emotional intelligence to augment your personal leadership style
    Apply emotional intelligence in a management role
  • 3. About Learning Tree International
    Learning Tree International was founded in 1974
    More than 2.1 million technology professionals and managers from more than 65,000 organizations trained to date
    In-depth course curriculum—more than 225 titles and growing
    Includes more than 90 management titles
    Courses are developed and taught by technology and business professionals actively working in the field
  • 4. About Learning Tree International(continued)
    New York
    Washington, D.C.
    Los Angeles
    Public and on-site courses are available at Learning Tree and client locations worldwide
  • 5. Course Delivery
    All courses are presented using MagnaLearn®, our proprietary, patented* instructional enhancement technology
    We also provide courses via our Learning Tree AnyWare™ platform
    Our (patent pending) training delivery solution that connects online participants to a live, instructor-led classroom
    With AnyWare, you can do everything the in-class participants do
    Participate in classroom discussions
    Perform hands-on exercises on the same equipment as in-class participants
    Participate in breakout sessions
    Get individual help and advice from the instructor—immediately as needed—just as in the classroom
    *Covered by one or more of the following patents: United States 7,058,891, 7,131,068, 7,134,079, and 7,454,708; South Africa 2005/09799; India 222822; and Australia 2002310120 and 2005266901. Other patents pending in EU, Israel, India, and Australia.
  • 6. About Your Instructor
    Background and education
    Current position
  • 7. Emotional Intelligence in Action
    Emotional Intelligence at Work
    Developing Emotional Intelligence
  • 8. Your Role in Building Great Performance
    In management, it’s imperative to
    Be clear about what’s expected of you as a manager
    Build purpose for your team
    Be clear about the specific things that managers do
    How you do these things will have a direct impact on
    Whether or not you can evoke great performance in the people you are managing
    Emotional Intelligence is the essential skillset that helps ordinary managers do extraordinary things
  • 9. Causing Great Performance: Leadership and Emotional Intelligence
    Effective leaders leverage their EI skills to do some basic things right
    Team building
    Managing performance
    Coaching & mentoring
    Redirecting poor behaviour
  • 10. The Connection Between EI and Bottom-Line Results
    EI-skilled managers are more in touch with feelings, emotions, and thought processes
    Their own
    In control of their emotional responses
    Able to adapt how they react in interpersonal situations
    Other people’s
    Empathetic to others
    Better able to read and interpret body language
    Cognizant of personality types
  • 11. Additional Benefits
    Better able to bring out the best in individuals and deal with people problems
    This leads to:
    Higher productivity
    Better communication
    Shared success across the entire organization
    Lower staff turnover
    Higher morale
    Greater cost savings
    Higher profits
    Less need for controls
  • 12. Emotional Intelligence
    The term emotional intelligence was popularized by Daniel Goleman* to describe the cluster of skills that effective leaders use to manage themselves and the people they work with
    He found that managers with good EI skills produced better bottom-line results
    These skills are the foundation on which your management success will be built
    Goleman has identified five components of emotional intelligence
    Three concerned with self-management, two with working with others
    *Goleman’s books are Emotional Intelligence (Bantam, 1995) and Working with Emotional Intelligence (Bantam, 1998). For information on applying EI, and papers on the background of EI development, see
  • 13. The Five Components of Emotional Intelligence:The Three Self-Management Skills
    Self-awareness: The ability to recognize and understand one’s moods, emotions, and drives, and their effect on others
    Characterized by self-confidence, realistic self-assessment, clarity about personal goals, candidness about personal feelings
    Self-regulation: The ability to control or redirect disruptive moods and impulses and to suspend judgment; to think before acting
    All managers work in situations involving strong emotions (their own and others’)
    Dealing with mistakes
    Handling tensions and conflicts with and between others
    The temptation to make a hasty response
    The ability to mentally step back andrespond thoughtfully under pressureis likely to build a climate of confidenceand respect in the team
    Are you aware of your emotions?
  • 14. The Five Components of Emotional Intelligence:The Three Self-Management Skills (continued)
    Self Motivation: A desire and drive to achieve, seek out challenges, and learn from both success and failure
    Characterized by commitment and persistence
  • 15. The Five Components of Emotional Intelligence: Two Skills for Working With Others
    Empathy: The ability to understand the emotional situations of others and treat them according to their reactions to a situation
    A crucial skill for managers, since so much of a manager’s work is about working with others in situations of tension and pressure
    Empathy skills enable managers to relate to the feelings and situations of others
    In mentoring and coaching
    In working and building managerial relationships with talented people
    In listening to the emotions expressed in difficult situations and responding in a way that acknowledges and deals with those emotions in a productive way
  • 16. The Five Components of Emotional Intelligence: Two Skills for Working With Others (continued)
    Social skill: The skill of applying the four preceding skills to build and maintain relationships with a wide range of people
    Skilled in persuasion, using different approaches according to the situation
    Good at building networks
    Comfortable with and interested in a wide range of people, whether or not they are directly involved with the manager’s work
  • 17. Emotional Intelligence in Action
    Emotional Intelligence at Work
    Developing Emotional Intelligence
  • 18. The Value of Personal Emotional Honesty
    To be emotionally honest, we must first be emotionally aware
    Expressing your true feelings also takes
    Being honest with ourselves helps us
    Be more self-accepting
    Decide how to spend our time, and whom to spend it with
    Being honest with others
    Encourages honesty in them
    Reduces the tendency of others to pressure us
    Helps us find out who respects our feelings
  • 19. Self-Awareness and Personal Honesty
    Patterns of disclosure and honesty
    Unintended repression
    Complete disclosure
    Intentional manipulation
    Emotional fraud
    Self-awareness and self-disclosure
    When being emotionally honest is in our interests
    When it is not healthy or safe to be emotionally honest
    Therefore achieving discretionary disclosure
    Takes more effort!
    Creates tension, distrust, and stress
  • 20. Recognizing and Affirming Your Emotions
    In our daily life, we don’t pay much attention to what’s happening now
    Looking without seeing
    Eating without tasting
    Hearing without listening
    Talking without focusing on what we are really saying
    We spend much of our time focusing on
    What has happened
    Or what will or might happen
    For emotional competency, it’s important to remember that there are many things going on for you right now
    “Emotions are only temporary… they always pass on like clouds in the sky.”
    —The 14th Dalai Lama
  • 21. Mindfulness
    This is an active process
    It means paying attention to what is real for you right here and now
    Without thinking that it’s good or bad, important or not, right or wrong
    The simple goal is to become more aware of both internal and external environments
    You can choose to become “mindful” with any experience
    Choosing to become mindful of your emotional experiences
    “The awareness that emerges through paying attention on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally to the unfolding of experience moment by moment.”
    — Jon Kabat-Zinn, Professor of Medicine Emeritus, University of Massachusetts Medical School
    Kabat-Zinn, Jon. “Mindfulness-based Interventions in Context: Past, Present, and Future.” Clinical Psychology, Vol. 10 (May, 2003), pp. 144–156.
  • 22. Mindfulness and Emotions
    It is important to disengage from the “story” of the emotion
    What or who caused it, whether we like it, whether it’s justified
    All this focuses on the past or the future
    We spend too little time paying attention to what is happening now!
    Paying attention to the “story” of the emotion tends to fuel the emotion, and we become consumed by it. We need to learn to pay attention to the emotion and the experience, not the story.
  • 23. Mindfulness and Emotions(continued)
    Four steps to mindfulness
    Our goal is to experience the emotion
    Not to repress or deny it
    Nor to express or act it out
  • 24. Dealing with Conflict: Fight or Flight
    Many people have difficulty with workplace conflict
    The typical response is “fight or flight”
    We learn to respond to conflict long before we realize it is present
    Examples of how this causes “flight” behavior include
    Avoiding difficult situations and meetings
    Not speaking up when we disagree with what is being said
    Examples of how this causes “fight” behavior include
    Reacting defensively to an innocent request for more information
    Deliberately providing the wrong information
  • 25. Discretionary Disclosure and Boundary Management
    Knowing your emotions vs. revealing your emotions
    There are times when it is not healthy or safe to be emotionally honest
    It is important to make conscious choices about when to disclose how you feel and be emotionally honest
    Consider both what is in your interest and what is in the interest of others
    Weigh the advantages of disclosure against any disadvantage
  • 26. Authenticity
    As the ancient Greeks said, “Be true to oneself”
    Owning your own thoughts, emotions, needs, preferences, beliefs, and values
    Behaving according to them
    Inauthentic leadership is not being true to yourself
    This involves leadership by
    “This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the day the night, thou canst not then be false to any man.”
    —William Shakespeare, Hamlet
  • 27. Authenticity and Congruence
    Authentic leader behaviors
    Understand yourself, not just the organization
    Practice your own values; don’t borrow from others
    Lead with your heart, not just your head
    • From an EI viewpoint, being open and authentic requires us to
    • 28. Be aware of our emotions and feelings
    • 29. Decide whether and how to disclose them
    • 30. Let people know how we feel
    Congruence is judged by the match between
    What we say
    Our nonverbal behavior
    The decisions and actions we take
  • 31. Benefits of Authenticity
    Being real and genuine creates buy-in
    People feel meaningfully connected to the leader
    They will offer support under difficult circumstances
    It encourages others to be emotionally honest
    And promotes an emotionally intelligent organization
  • 32. Basics of Self-Management
    Having the ability to determine how we feel, think, and act
    In contrast to being a slave to our impulses
    Routine patterns we have learned
    Impulsive or automatic reactions
    Remember: management, not control
    Control implies willpower
    Management involves becoming aware of what is affecting us and then deciding how to respond
    Becoming more strategic in how we respond
    Allowing long-term benefits to overcome short-term gratification
    Gaining mastery over how we respond
    All the while remaining true to our values in the longer term
  • 33. Self-Management and the Emotional Response Triad
    Why care?
    To be truly effective, we have to manage how we respond
    Apply the emotional triad:
    We experience an event
    We interpret the situation
    Then we react
    You can unlearn what you have learned
    Behavioral self-control training
    Cognitive self-regulation
    Self-management techniques
    Action tendency
  • 34. The Emotional Triad
    Reaction(based on past experience)
    Response (choosing how to respond)
    Action tendency
  • 35. The Marshmallow Experiment
    A well-known experiment conducted at Stanford University in the 1960s
    A group of four-year-olds was given a marshmallow and told they could have another only if they could wait 20 minutes before eating the first one
    Some waited; others did not
    Following their progress into adolescence
    Those who could wait were better adjusted and more dependable
    They scored on average 210 points higher on the Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT)
    Deferred gratification is an example of an emotional competence
    Source: Shoda, Yuichi, Walter Mischel, and Philip K. Peake. “Predicting Adolescent Cognitive and Self-Regulatory Competencies From Preschool Delay of Gratification: Identifying Diagnostic Conditions.” Developmental Psychology, Vol. 26 (November, 1990), pp. 978–986.
  • 36. Five Steps for Self-Management Preparation
    Recognize the emotion you are experiencing
    Acknowledge any impulsive reactions you want to make
    Anticipate the possible negative consequences of the action
    Trade any immediate pleasure for long-term strategic advantage
    Decide whether and how to respond
  • 37. Additional Self-Management Techniques
    Working with your emotions
    Apply IDEDA
    Taking care of yourself
  • 38. 1. The Reframing Process: ABCDEF
    Activating event
    “Sue doesn’t like me”
    Belief (irrational)
    “Sue must like me”
    “I am angry and feel foolish”
    “Why must she like me? What evidence is there?”
    Effective belief
    “I’d prefer Sue to like me, but I’ll survive if she doesn’t”
    “I think it’s wrong of Sue not to like me”
    “That’s just the way of the world, and nothing dreadful is going to happen”
    Feeling (new)
    “I’m disappointed that Sue doesn’t like me”
  • 39. 2. Self-Monitoring: ABC
    Good for impulsive reactions
    For example, used extensively in smoking cessation and weight control
    Keep a diary of your emotional-change episodes
    Use the following columns:
    Activity: What happened that led to my change in emotions?
    Beliefs: What beliefs led to the change in my emotions?
    Consequences: How big was the emotional change on a scale of 1–10?
  • 40. 2. Self-Monitoring: ABC(continued)
    Use the diary data to challenge your beliefs and interpretations
    Pessimism and perfectionism
    Challenge your beliefs
    Look for evidence of alternative ways to make sense of the situation
    Challenge your beliefs about what is threatening
    Look for less threatening interpretations of the situation
    Experience the worry and let is subside
    Prepare well
    Practice relaxation
    Identify what is triggering the anger
    Stand back
    Focus on other aspects of the situation
    If necessary—assert yourself
  • 41. 3. Affirmations
    Turning negative self-talk into something more useful
    Counters a lifetime of putting ourselves down, so no quick wins!
    Take the output from your reframing process
    Create reframed statements about you in relation to the situation
    Use a positive phrasing, make it personal, and start with “I”
    Say, “I am confident making this suggestion to the meeting”
    Don’t say, “I am not as scared as I used to be when making this suggestion”
    Keep it in present tense—use “I am”
    Avoid “should,” “must,” “could,” “can”
    Make sure it is possible and believable to you
    Write it down
    Repeat it to yourself every day while imagining the outcome
  • 42. 4. Working With Your Emotions
    Find ways to work through the emotion
    Experience the emotion rather than shying away or avoiding it
    Focus on the emotion, not the story
    Notice the feeling—use the mindfulness technique
    Silently describe the feeling to yourself
    Allow it to blow itself out naturally
    Only then do you consider options and actions
    Talk through with a non-involved party
    Allow yourself time out
    Write the letter/e-mail, but do not send it!
  • 43. 5. IDEDA: A Rational Process Model
    Identify the emotion
    Take time to experience it
    Think about the wheel of emotion and emotional vocabulary
    Determine the real cause
    Take time to assess and reassess the situation
    Check your interpretation
    Evaluate options for action
    Doing nothing may be a suitable action
    Consciously commit to an action
    Act: take action
    Remember that changing the way we think is an action
  • 44. 6. Taking Care of Yourself
    Take care of yourself in order to care for others in your leadership role
    Centering yourself in your environment
    Pause for a moment
    Look around and notice five things you can see
    Listen and notice five things you can hear
    Notice five things you can feel in contact with your body
    Reduce your levels of stress and anxiety
    Many different methods exist
    Find one that suits you
    Breathing and relaxation techniques
  • 45. If All Else Fails…
    Rubber band snap!
    Put a rubber band around your wrist
    Snap it every time you notice negative self-talk
    Over time, the negative stimulus (pain) is paired with that thinking
  • 46. Can Emotional Intelligence Be Learned?
    Learning the skills of emotional intelligence is not simply a matter of reading a book
    Emotion is not an intellectual mental process
    Uses different parts of the brain than intellect
    Proficient use of emotional intelligence is not as simple as learning a new applied skill set like riding a bike, or using Oracle
    It is best learned through practice
    Identify areas where your emotional intelligence can be enhanced
    Through your own or others’ observations of your behavior
    Request feedback and coaching from others about your behavior and how it could be more effective
    Put the new behavior into practice and get more feedback
    Hands-on coaching is the most effective way to learn or teach EI
  • 47. Session Objectives Revisited
    Introduced you to Learning Tree International
    Provided you with information on Emotional Intelligence
    Identified five emotional intelligences
    Leveraged emotional intelligence to become more self aware
    Applied emotional intelligence to gain greater control over your emotions
    • To learn more, Learning Tree offers the following courses:
    • 48. Course 3411, Emotional Intelligence: Achieving Leadership Success
    • 49. Course 222, Leadership Skills: Success through Teamwork
    • 50. Course 290, Management Skills
    • 51. Course 906, Management Skills for an IT Environment
    • 52. Course 3405, Developing your Leadership Voice
  • Your Guarantee of Satisfaction
    Unless you feel 100% satisfied that Learning Tree delivered even more than you expected, there is no fee for your course attendance. Our Guarantee of Quality lets you experience the value of the course—and then pay only if you feel the course was well worth the tuition.
  • 53. Thank You for Your Participation
    Any questions?
    Visit us at
    Call us at 1-800-THE-TREE
    We wish you every success in the future
    We hope to see you in class soon!