12 steps to get beyond perfectionism

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12 steps to get beyond perfectionism

12 steps to get beyond perfectionism

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  • 1. 12 PERFECTIONISM awareness that we are stuck 1. WAYS TO GET BEYOND BY LAUNCHYOURGENIUS.COM “Good enough is good enough. Perfect will make you a big fat mess every time.” ― Rebecca Wells ACTION TIPS: BECOME AWARE OF PERFECTIONISM OPERATING IN YOUR LIFE. ARE YOU STOPPING YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU ARE TRYING TO BE A PERFECTIONIST? MAKE A SHORT INVENTORY OF YOUR LIFE AND WHERE YOU ARE BEING A PERFECTIONIST. understand the types of Perfectionism  meticulous. It’s fear. Fear of 2. “At its root, perfectionism isn’t really about a deep love of beingFear of success.”aboutMichael Law making a mistake. Fear of disappointing others. Fear of failure. ― ACTION TIPS: PERFECTIONISM COMES IN DIFFERENT FORMS: SELF IMPOSED, IMPOSING ON OTHERS AND SOCIAL. IT MAY OR MAY NOT INDUCE STRESS AND OTHER MALADAPTIVE STATES. cast aside unsupportive past beliefs 3.“I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won’t have to die.” ― Anne Lamott ACTION TIPS: CAST ASIDE PROGRAMS AND BELIEFS THAT PREDISPOSE YOU TOWARDS UNREALISTIC PERFECTIONISM. QUESTION THE VALIDITY OF ASSUMPTIONS THAT THESE BELIEFS ARE BASED UPON AND CHOOSE NEW BELIEFS.  4. “Don’t let perfect be the enemy of the good.”- Voltaire let go of Anxiety and Stress ACTION TIPS: BECOME AWARE THAT THE PERFECTIONISM TRAP IS A CYCLE OF UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS, EXCESSIVELY HIGH STANDARDS, INCORRECT ASSESSMENT, STRESS, OVERWHELM AND SELF-CENSURE.  BREAK THE CYCLE OF MALADAPTIVE PERFECTIONISM BY DECIDING TO CONSCIOUSLY REDUCE THE STRESS ASSOCIATED WITH PERFORMANCE. 5.“It’s in our biology to trust what we see with our eyes. This makes living in a carefully edited, release Fear, Low Self-Worth and Shame overproduced and photoshopped world very dangerous.” ― Brené Brown ACTION TIPS: UNDERSTAND THAT FEAR, SHAME AND LOW SELF-WORTH MAY BE ORCHESTRATING THE PERFECTIONISM. EMBRACE THE OPPOSITE: EXCITEMENT, ACCEPTANCE AND GREAT SELF-WORTH. AFFIRM AND BELIEVE THAT YOUR WORK IS GOOD ENOUGH. DO NOT ENGAGE WITH SELF-DEFEATING THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS. 6. Blame, Self-Criticism and Criticism From Others: The Judgment Trap “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” – Rumi ACTION TIPS: CAST ASIDE SELF-CRITICISM AND SELF-BLAME THAT IS PROPELLING YOUR PERFECTIONISM FORWARD. CHOOSE SELF-ACCEPTANCE AND PRAISE YOUR WORK AS GOOD ENOUGH.  Trust, Safety and control Issues 7. “Perfectionism is not a prerequisite for anything but pain.” ― Danna Faulds ACTION TIPS: ADDRESS YOUR TRUST AND SAFETY ISSUES. TAKE VERY SMALL STEPS TOWARDS DELEGATING TASKS TO OTHERS AND LOOSEN THE GRIP ON CONTROL. TAKE SMALL RISKS TOWARDS ALLOWING YOURSELF TO BE LESS PERFECTIONISTIC IN YOUR APPROACH.  DEVELOP A SENSE OF SAFETY AND TRUST IN YOURSELF AND THE ABILITY OF OTHERS.   Set Up Rules and Deadlines for Your Project: Structures that Work 8. “But I am learning that perfection isn’t what matters. In fact, it’s the very thing that can destroy you if you let it.” ― Emily Giffin ACTION TIPS: SET UP STRUCTURES, RULES AND DEADLINES TO MANAGE PERFECTIONISM.  ENLIST SOCIAL SUPPORT TO WORK THROUGH SOME OF YOUR PERFECTIONISM ISSUES. 9. “We freeze up because we expect a certain result or because we want things to Getting Realistic and Dropping Standards be perfect.” ― Bernie Glassman ACTION TIPS: MANY PERFECTIONISTS THINK IN BLACK AND WHITE. IT IS ALL OR NOTHING. HOW ARE YOU THINKING? IF ON A SCALE FROM 1 TO 10, 7-10 BEING A GREAT JOB AND 1-3 BEING A POORLY DONE JOB, WHERE WOULD YOU PLACE YOURSELF? PERFECTIONISTS= MORE THAN 10 ALWAYS! UNDERSTAND WHERE YOU STAND IN THE SCALE OF PERFECTIONISM AND DIAL IT BACK A NOTCH.  10. “90 percent perfect and shared with the world always changes more lives than Moving Forward: Small Steps to overcome 100 percent perfect and stuck in your head.” ― Jon Acuff ACTION TIPS: UNDERSTAND YOUR TARGET AND THE STEPS FORWARD TO PREVENT GETTING CAUGHT UP IN DETAILS. BECOME VERY CLEAR ABOUT YOUR START POINT AND YOUR END POINT. 11. Become a Scientist in Your own Life: Observe, Experiment and Change the Core Concepts “The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake - you can't learn anything from being perfect. “-Adam Osborne ACTION TIPS: TEST EVERYTHING OUT FOR YOURSELF AND USE THE POWER OF THE SCIENTIFIC PROCESS TO BUST THROUGH THE FALSE FOUNDATIONS OF PERFECTIONISM. REPLACE THE DEEPEST MOTIVATIONS BEHIND PERFECTIONISM WITH A HIGHER PURPOSE AND VALUE. SHIFT THE FOCUS FROM YOURSELF TO A GREATER GOOD.  12. “Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it.” -Salvador Dali A new Model: Value the Process  ACTION TIPS: A NEW MODEL FOR PERFECTION: EXCELLENCE!  REPLACE PERFECTIONISM WITH: EXCELLENCE + SIMPLICITY + KAIZEN (CONSTANT IMPROVEMENT) + FOCUS + IMPERFECTION OR GOOD ENOUGH + ENJOY THE JOURNEY + ABILITY TO FAIL + REDUCE STRESS. LAUNCHYOURGENIUS.COM