Skills for counselling

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  • 1. Skills for CounsellingByJayadeva de Silva.M.Sc, FIPM, FITDCounselling requires a set of skills which focuses mostly on feelingsFeelings can block rational decision making and personal growthFeelings are generated by incidents at work or at home as far as theclient is concerned. Feelings may dissipate energyCounselling InterviewStages of a Counselling Interview are as follows:Establish RapportExploreIntegrationIdentifying alternativesDirection towards a solutionAgree on an action planEnd or Closure 1
  • 2. Establishing rapportAttending skills are required to establish rapport with the counselee(the client)Attending means both Physically and MentallyExplorationProbing skills are needed to explore the issues with the clientProbing is done by Asking open ended questions Ask questions as a non expertActive Listening SkillsActive Listening Skill is the Heart of Empathic UnderstandingActive Listening involves Empathetic listening (Listening with empathy) Contextual Listening (Listening with reference to the particular context)Restating or paraphrasingParaphrasing is not mere “parroting”Purpose of paraphrasing is to show you are both listening andunderstanding what is being said.It helps the speaker see other points of view.How paraphrasing is doneRestate basic ideas and facts.Example“So you would like your friends to include you at recess, is thatright?” 2
  • 3. EncouragingPurpose is to convey interest. This encourages the other person tokeep talking.How it is done Don’t agree or disagree. Use neutral words. Use varying voice intonations.Example“Can you tell me more…?”ReflectingPurpose of reflecting is to show that you understand how the personfeels.How it is doneReflects the speaker’s basic feelings.Example: “You seem very upset.” Acknowledge non verbal messagesValidatingPurpose of validating is to acknowledge the worthiness of the otherperson.How validating is done Acknowledge the value of their issues and feelings. Show appreciation for their efforts and actions.Example“I truly appreciate your willingness to resolve this matter.”ClarifyingPurpose of clarifying is to help you clarify what is said.It helps you to get more information and it helps the speaker to seeother points of view.How it is done Ask questions. Restate wrong interpretation to force the speaker to explain 3
  • 4. further.Example“When did this happen?”“Do I have this right? You think he told you to give him the pencilbecause he doesn’t like you?”Periodic SummarizingCounsellor should be able summarize what had been doneperiodically.Purpose of summarizing is to To review progress. To pull together important ideas and facts. To establish a basis for further discussion. To move the counselling interview towards finding a solutionHow this is doneRestate major ideas expressed, including feelings.Example“These seem to be the key ideas you’ve expressed…”Generating alternatives, Analyzing and helping toChoose the most appropriate one for himDuring this stage counselee is encouraged to generate alternatives fora solutionHow it is done This is more like a brain storming session After that, these alternatives should be analyzed for feasibility Client is encouraged to choose his best alternative Action plan is then worked out by the client with the help of the CounsellorSensitively confrontCounsellor should sensitively confront the client if he is showingsigns of hesitation or withholding relevant information 4
  • 5. If necessary explore alternative solutions allow client to select thebest solution and agree on a realistic action planCase RecordingCounsellor should be able to take brief notes whilst the interview inprogressIt helps to remember what took place at the interview when clientscome for the next sessionClient should be told that notes are being taken and for what purposeJayadeva de Silva obtained Master’s degree in Science from Russian Friendship University Moscow and Diploma inPersonnel Management from National Institute of Business Management( SriLanka). He is a fellow of both the Instituteof Personnel Management IPM) and Institute of Training & development.(SLITAD) He is also professionally qualified intraining systems & curriculum design with an ILO fellowship.A strong advocate of Human Talents Development, Jayadeva is the Principal Consultant/Director of HumantalentsUnlimited, a professional practice that provides training & consultancy in Management. Jayadeva has carried outseveral consultancy projects and conducted numerous management development programs/strategic planningworkshops, and has been trained in many modern management and leadership concepts. He has contributed articles(over 50) and authored the trend setting book ‘Human Talents Management’.He founded humantalents International and HRSriLanka virtual learning Groups. Jayadeva de Silva functioned asGroup Manager (Human Resources Development) of Hayleys Group of Companies and Group Director–HumanResources of Brown & Co.He serves as a resource person for professional and post graduate courses primarily in the areas of HRM & HRD atPost graduate Institute- University of Peradeniya, University of Ruhuna, ICFAI University (India), University of Ballarat(Australia) SriLanka Foundation Institute IPM & SLITAD.He is a past president of HRDGateway, an International organization of over 45,000 HR Professionals worldwide. He isfeatured in the millennium registry of SriLankan personalitiesHe can be contacted as follows E mail djayadeva@gmail.com 011 2562449 077 7272295 Web humantalents@yahoogroups.com Some of his publications are available for fee download from www.slideshare.net/Jayadeva 5