A Dickens of A Keynote

A DICKENS OF A KEYNOTE

JAMES EDWARD GRAY II•I have been in the Ruby community a moderately long time•Ihave written code, books, and other documentation, plus organized events•Ihave now given a talk at every Lone Star Ruby Conference (if you will allow one by video proxy)•I am currently giving my ﬁrst keynote address!

THE GHOST OFKEYNOTES PRESENT

WHAT IS A KEYNOTE?

I USED KEYNOTE Image from http://www.apple.com/iwork/keynote/

15 MINUTES?

ASK LSRCImage from http://lonestarrubyconf.com/

ASK LSRCEveryone gets a keynote!Image from http://lonestarrubyconf.com/

THE COLOR RED?

…the keynote address… is delivered to set the underlying tone and summarize the core messageor most important revelation of the event. Deﬁnition from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keynote

I’M RIGHT!

I’M RIGHT! The power!!!

THE GHOST OFKEYNOTES PAST Photo from http://www.nomedojogo.com/page/2/

A STUDY OF GREAT KEYNOTES• Speakers tend to talk about what’s important to them• They relate personal anecdotes to our lives as Rubyists• Such speeches are usually light on code and heavy on ideas• It’s common to talk about the future• The goal seems to be to inspire the audience

WHAT ISSHE DOING? Photo fromhttp://www.pregnancy-and-giving-birth.com/

HOW???

JUST EAT ITPhoto from http://eclipsstudios.blogspot.com/2008_10_01_archive.html

THE CABBAGE FIELDPhoto from http://rev-views.blogspot.com/2008/11/dvds-in-review-41-cabbage.html

IS THIS DANGEROUS?Photo from http://www.playinghouseblog.com/2011/01/dubai-farmers-market.html

I GOOGLED IT

I GOOGLED IT•Iknow it sounds weird but you can put cabbage leaves on your breasts and it will dry your milk out! I did it and it works.

I GOOGLED IT•Iknow it sounds weird but you can put cabbage leaves on your breasts and it will dry your milk out! I did it and it works.• Cool cabbage compresses will reduce swelling quickly, and if left in place for long periods will help diminish milk supply. This method may be used instead of or in addition to removing small amounts of milk to reduce supply. Use fresh green leaves, cleaned and chilled, wrapped around the breasts. Change them about every two hours.

THE ORIGINALAUTHORITY

MAGIC WORDS scientiﬁc study double-blind placebo controlled peer reviewed Study fromhttp://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10205435

THE PROCESS• Question• Think critically• Search for evidence

THIS IS SKEPTICISM

WHAT DO SKEPTICS DO? Photo from http://rubyhacker.com/

I doubt that! I doubt that!WHAT DO SKEPTICS DO? Photo from http://rubyhacker.com/

THE TRAITS OF A SKEPTIC• Questions authority (respectfully, of course)•A questioning attitude of knowledge, facts, or opinions/beliefs stated as facts• Suspended judgement and systemic doubt• Requires all new information to be well supported by evidence

SKEPTICAL INTERESTS• Common brain malfunctions• Conspiracy theories and other myths• Logical fallacies

WHAT IS HYPNAGOGIA? Photo from http://ufoclearinghouse.webs.com/ufochreportingcenter.htm

MYTHICAL CREATURES• Bigfoot• El Chupacabra• 911 “Truthers”• Feng Shui Experts• Chiropractors

LOGICAL FALLACIES

LOGICAL FALLACIES•I know it sounds weird but… put cabbage… on your breasts

LOGICAL FALLACIES•I know it sounds weird but… put cabbage… on your breasts • Argumentum ad Ignorantiam (appeal to ignorance)

LOGICAL FALLACIES•I know it sounds weird but… put cabbage… on your breasts • Argumentum ad Ignorantiam (appeal to ignorance)• Cool cabbage compresses… for long periods… diminish milk

LOGICAL FALLACIES•I know it sounds weird but… put cabbage… on your breasts • Argumentum ad Ignorantiam (appeal to ignorance)• Cool cabbage compresses… for long periods… diminish milk • Confusing association with causation

LOGICAL FALLACIES•I know it sounds weird but… put cabbage… on your breasts • Argumentum ad Ignorantiam (appeal to ignorance)• Cool cabbage compresses… for long periods… diminish milk • Confusing association with causation• Breast Feeding Nazi: “Put cabbage on your breast to dry up”

LOGICAL FALLACIES•I know it sounds weird but… put cabbage… on your breasts • Argumentum ad Ignorantiam (appeal to ignorance)• Cool cabbage compresses… for long periods… diminish milk • Confusing association with causation• Breast Feeding Nazi: “Put cabbage on your breast to dry up” • Argument from authority

REMEMBER:BE SKEPTICAL NOT CYNICAL

WHAT ABOUT RUBY?

SKEPTICS MAKEBETTER PROGRAMMERS

WE KNOW THIS Think about optimizations

PROGRAMMING FALLACIES

PROGRAMMING FALLACIES• That [language construct] shouldn’t be used because it’s [evil]

PROGRAMMING FALLACIES• That [language construct] shouldn’t be used because it’s [evil] • Argument from ﬁnal consequences (teleological)

PROGRAMMING FALLACIES• That [language construct] shouldn’t be used because it’s [evil] • Argument from ﬁnal consequences (teleological)• [Some tool] is better than [other tool]

PROGRAMMING FALLACIES• That [language construct] shouldn’t be used because it’s [evil] • Argument from ﬁnal consequences (teleological)• [Some tool] is better than [other tool] • The toupee fallacy (counting hits and ignoring misses)

PROGRAMMING FALLACIES• That [language construct] shouldn’t be used because it’s [evil] • Argument from ﬁnal consequences (teleological)• [Some tool] is better than [other tool] • The toupee fallacy (counting hits and ignoring misses)• We rewrote it in [language] and now it is [amazing]

PROGRAMMING FALLACIES• That [language construct] shouldn’t be used because it’s [evil] • Argument from ﬁnal consequences (teleological)• [Some tool] is better than [other tool] • The toupee fallacy (counting hits and ignoring misses)• We rewrote it in [language] and now it is [amazing] • Confusing association with causation

THE CULTURE OF TESTING

I TESTProof available upon request

THE ONLY WAY

WE ALWAYS DO IT

THAT’S HOWTHE EXPERTS DO IT

IS THIS STILL POSITIVE?

WHO DO WE WANT TO BECOME?

MY ANSWER:I WANT US TO BE A CULTURETHAT REASONS TOGETHER

ZED SHAW

*F* HIM!

*F* HIM!Did I mention DHH?

WHAT’S NEXT?

THE GHOST OFKEYNOTES FUTUREPhoto from http://www.ﬂickr.com/photos/oreillyconf/4682679962/

OBIE’S KEYNOTE Image from http://lonestarrubyconf.com/

CHAD’S KEYNOTE Image from http://lonestarrubyconf.com/

TOPIC UNKNOWN Image from http://lonestarrubyconf.com/

REALSOFTWARE ENGINEERING

Glenn can and should give his Real Software Engineering talk,essentially unchanged, at basically any conference thatll have him. Its a fantastic talk,and its just as valuable the third time youve seen it as the ﬁrst. Ben Scoﬁeld to the RubyConf Organizers mailing list

GLENN’S JOKE

I do think software is… in some respects, a science.Glenn Vanderburg in Real Software Engineering

MY JOKE

WE WANT MORE SCIENCE!

REFRESHER: THE SCIENTIFIC METHOD• You start by making observations• This leads you to form a hypothesis• You try to prove yourself wrong• You submit the idea for peer review• We always go forward with the best understanding we currently have

BE OBSERVANT

A HYPOTHESISMUST BE FALSIFIABLE…

… AND MAKE USEFULPREDICTIONS ABOUT THE FUTURE

AIM FOR WRONG, NOT RIGHT

A JURY OF YOUR PEERS

KNOWLEDGE IS ALWAYS UP FOR REVISION

REAL SCIENCE• It’s messy• It doesn’t only happen in labs• It’s for everyone• It’s imperfect by deﬁnition, but self-correcting

Science is the best thingthat humanity has ever come up with. And if it isnt, then science will ﬁx it. Bill Nye the Science Guy

WE ARE DOING SCIENCE Great news!

AGILE DEVELOPMENTHELPS US MAKE PREDICTIONS ABOUT THE PROJECT

TESTING IS HOW WE TRYTO PROVE CODE WRONG

GITHUB AND BLOGGING ARE HOW WE HANDLE PEER REVIEW

RECENT INSPIRATIONS• Avdi Grimm’s Vituous Code blog and Exceptional Ruby book• Aaron Patterson’s improvements to Rails• GregoryBrown’s Ruby Mendicant University and Practicing Ruby essays

MY LATEST EFFORT http://rubyrogues.com/

MORE OF THIS, PLEASE!

MY HOPE:THAT WE PUT THE SCIENCEBACK IN COMPUTER SCIENCE

WHAT SHOULD WE DO?

REIMAGINEDOCUMENTATION

RDOC ISN’T ENOUGH

WHAT ABOUTTUTORIALS OR Q&A?

YARD IS JUST RDOC++

WHERE’S THE RUBYOF DOCUMENTATION?

EXPAND PAIRING

SYSTEMS ARE HUGE

PROGRAMMERS SPECIALIZE

BUSINESS NEEDS VERSES TALENT

WHAT IF WE COULDSHARE A LOT MORE?

YOUR IDEA HERE!

ONE MORE THING…

YOU CAN HELP Science says so

ASCH PARADIGMImage from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asch_conformity_experiments

75% CONFORMTO WRONG IDEAS

BUT JUSTONE DISSENTER…

YOU CAN CHANGE OUR COMMUNITY!

THANK YOU

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A Dickens of A Keynote

by James Gray on Aug 12, 2011

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