Self Development

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  • 1. self development month FIRST IMPRESSIONS Resonating: Internals order Externals Num 13:33 ...and we were in our own sight as grasshoppers, and so we were in their sight.
  • 2. self development month FIRST IMPRESSIONS Some fundamentals: How Approachable U R? Prov 18:24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly. Prov 18:19 A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city.
  • 3. self development month Approachable Body Talk :smile :relaxed body :eye contact & nodding happy, pleased, interested, approachable Prov 15:13 A merry heart makes a cheerful countenance. Prov 17:22 A merry heart does good, like medicine, But a broken spirit dries the bones. Is 61:3...beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.
  • 4. self development month Approachable Risk :open posture :create space for others to join :appearing similar to others :adapt to the social environment minimise fear of rejection & obstacles Jn 21:7-12...that disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, "It is the Lord!" Now when Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on his outer garment (for he had removed it), and plunged into the sea. But the other disciples came in the little boat (for they were not far from land, but about two hundred cubits), dragging the net with fish. Then, as soon as they had come to land, they saw a fire of coals there, and fish laid on it, and bread. Jesus said to them, "Bring some of the fish which you have just caught." Simon Peter went up and dragged the net to land, full of large fish, one hundred and fifty-three; and although there were so many, the net was not broken. Jesus said to them, "Come and eat breakfast."
  • 5. self development month Approachable Fit :dress sense :create space for others to join :appearing similar to others :adapt to the social environment affirming, making others comfortable about themselves, you are like them & safe 1Cor 9: 19-23 For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win the more; and to the Jews I became as a Jew, that I might win Jews; to those who are under the law, as under the law, that I might win those who are under the law; to those who are without law, as without law (not being without law toward God, but under law toward Christ), that I might win those who are without law; to the weak I became as weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some. Now this I do for the gospel's sake, that I may be partaker of it with you.
  • 6. self development month Approachable Appearance :looking appropriate and fitting in :personal grooming, clean & neat, HOT :personal style reflects individuality & awareness of the world around you :confidence & pursuit of excellence health conscious, respect yourself, make an effort to be pleasing to others, care 1Kings 10:4-5 When the queen of Sheba had seen all the wisdom of Solomon, the house that he had built, the food on his table, the seating of his servants, the service of his waiters and their apparel, his cupbearers, and his entryway by which he went up to the house of the LORD, there was no more spirit in her.
  • 7. self development month Approachable Mood :enthusiasm -presence -passion -positive -confidence your mood changes people Gen 21:6 And Sarah said, "God has made me laugh, and all who hear will laugh with me."
  • 8. self development month FIRST IMPRESSIONS Some fundamentals: Showing Interest Acts 14:8-10 And in Lystra a certain man without strength in his feet was sitting, a cripple from his mother's womb, who had never walked. This man heard Paul speaking. Paul, observing him intently and seeing that he had faith to be healed, said with a loud voice, "Stand up straight on your feet!" And he leaped and walked.
  • 9. self development month Interest: Physical Focus :leaning toward them :smiling :nodding core social benefit that we all seek & react to is feeling appreciated and understood. Prov 20:5 Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water, But a man of understanding will draw it out. 1Jn 4:19 We love Him because He first loved us.
  • 10. self development month Interest: Eye Contact :less - means less interested :more - uncomfortable or threatened :match eye contact business triangle Matt 6:22-23 "Your eyes are windows into your body. If you open your eyes wide in wonder and belief, your body fills up with light. If you live squinty-eyed in greed and distrust, your body is a dank cellar. If you pull the blinds on your windows, what a dark life you will have!
  • 11. self development month Interest: Name :cocktail party effect: your name :you communicate that you: -cared, registered, remembered :match eye contact breaks through all your perceptual filters & grabs your attention Rev 3:5 He who overcomes shall be clothed in white garments, and I will not blot out his name from the Book of Life; but I will confess his name before My Father and before His angels.
  • 12. self development month Interest: Asking & Listening :ask open questions instead of closed questions - ask others about themselves that include facts, feelings & opinions :listen actively & not as if you’re listening to a pre-recorded telephone message while checking your e-mails/pretend listening Jn 21:17 He said to him the third time, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?" Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, "Do you love Me?" And he said to Him, "Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You." Jesus said to him, "Feed My sheep.
  • 13. self development month Interest: Responding :how are you, really? respond with honest feelings & emotions - briefly!!! Jn 21:17 He said to him the third time, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?" Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, "Do you love Me?" And he said to Him, "Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You." Jesus said to him, "Feed My sheep.