Marriage Fundamentals Love DNA


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describing the benefits of knowing your Love DNA for a happier marriage.

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Marriage Fundamentals Love DNA

  1. 1. The Love DNA
  2. 2.  Founder of Good Works of Love Ministry Master in Ministry/Christian Counseling Certified Marriage Educator A.P.S. Temperament Therapist Pastoral Life & Marriage Coach Radio Host & Producer ◦ Great Big Life ◦ Gems of Glory ◦ Life Line Radio Author
  3. 3. “Heart” is used over 800 timesAttributes a central place in Spirit-soul activities and AffectionsDistinguishes it from the operations of the head and brain.Ancient cultures had a similar concept of the brain and the heartstimulating and reacting to each other.Hebrew concept of the heart included thought, emotions and willClassifications of the applications of the word “heart” to man:•Physical•Spiritual•Moral So we can see that the•Emotional•Motivations heart has a big role to play•Thought life in our human lives.
  4. 4. CapacityGreat people possess capacity-the capacity to produce something great.Col 1:27 Christ in us, the Hope of Glory1 John 3:9 Born of His seed. (We have the DNA of Heaven) We inherit which created the universe. Happy Couples discover their capacity to be great husbands & wives.
  5. 5. Goal OrientedGreat people possess vision, aim or goals. Fixing their eyes on the Aim, the Prize1 Cor 9:24-26 Run to win Happy Couples AIM for a Happy Marriage.
  6. 6. TimeGreat people realize that investment in a good marriage requires time over time.Gal 6:9 Do not lose heart in doing good. Happy Couples invest the necessary time and faith for their good works of love to manifest into a Happy Marriage.
  7. 7. PerseveranceGreat people have stick-to-it-ness commitment.Eph 5:3 Dream comes through much great effort. Happy Couples keep building on their good works of love.
  8. 8. ConsistencyGreat people must be ready in season and out of season.2 Tim 4: 2 Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, withall longsuffering and teaching. My Coaching guides couples through the refining fires of what may seem like a crucible.
  9. 9. SacrificeGreat people regard others over themselves. How well do we really love ourspouses? Marriage is not about us. It is about reflecting the love of Christ in ourwords and actions.1 John 4:20-21 We cannot truly love God while neglecting to love those who arecreated in His imageA Happy Marriage must be sown in Good Works of Love with a pure heart.
  10. 10. Teaches accountability for eachpersons actions and helps them tounderstand who God created him/her tobe.Teaches how His wonderful plan, forus as individuals, works and how it cancause every person to be happy andfulfilled during this life.
  11. 11.  These conflicts are caused by ◦ Attempting to meet your temperament needs in an ungodly way. ◦ Temperament needs being out of balance, i.e. all the persons energies are spent meeting some needs while other needs are ignored. ◦ Reactions to unmet temperament needs.
  12. 12.  Understanding of one’s unique self. Surrender to the Lord Jesus Christ and His plan for our lives A willingness to surrender the ungodly ways of meeting our temperament needs and replacing them with methods which are conducive to the Bible. This is a daily surrender
  13. 13. EmotionsMind Will
  14. 14. Our temperament Our Love DNAin our emotion area pinpoints ouris affected by deep perception ofrelationships: ourselves and1. our parents Emotions the people2. Spouse Mind who love us.3. children4. best friend. It also is a Will determining factor in how well we handle the stresses and pressures of life
  15. 15.  The difference between inborn temperament and one’s personality is learned behavior.
  16. 16. Building Blocks SELF SELECTED  The first building “PERSONALITY” block of understanding (Mask) human behavior isMAN/ENVIRONMENT AFFECTED “CHARACTER” God-created. This is (Learned Behavior) called our temperament. When we are conceived our GOD-CREATED unique temperament “TEMPERAMENT” is placed within us by (Inborn) the order of God.
  17. 17. Building Blocks  The second building block or understanding human behavior is that we are SELF SELECTED man/environment-affected. “PERSONALITY” This is called our character. (Mask)  Upon birth we begin to interact with our environment and ourMAN/ENVIRONMENT AFFECTED environment interacts with “CHARACTER” us. The environment is (Learned Behavior) everything we see, hear, smell, feel, and learn. These perceptions are forever locked into our brain and these things slightly mold GOD-CREATED and alter our temperament, “TEMPERAMENT” forming character (Inborn) (temperament + environment = Character)
  18. 18. Building Blocks  The third building block of understanding human behavior is self-selected. SELF SELECTED This is called our “PERSONALITY” personality. This may or (Mask) may not be part of our temperament or character. This is the way we perceiveMAN/ENVIRONMENT AFFECTED how we must behave to “CHARACTER” survive in the world in which we live. (Learned Behavior)  The one major problem with personality is that it is a mask we wear and as with any mask it can’t be worn for GOD-CREATED very long. Eventually the “TEMPERAMENT” person will revert back to (Inborn) temperament and character. This may be why some people may act one way at home and different way out in the world.
  19. 19. Sanguine Phlegmatic SupineWhat is yourTemperament? Melancholy Choleric
  20. 20.  The understanding of temperament gives us a special knowledge of the inner workings of ourselves and others. It helps identify the pressures we feel which results from: ◦ The world in which we live ◦ Our weaknesses and desires
  21. 21.  The understanding of temperament also helps us develop a stronger relationship with God by showing us how to let God work in our lives and how to interact with God in ways that are beneficial to us. Temperament therapy offers answers to why we have stresses and conflict in our lives and how to overcome them.
  22. 22.  There are parts of man that are closely related and cannot be separated. Each is a determining factor in man’s behavior; they are the physical, spiritual and emotional areas of mankind (mind, spirit and body). mind spirit body
  23. 23.  Most temperament researchers and writers have the simplistic view that an individual is one temperament (melancholy). This course teaches this is seldom true. Humans are complex both biologically and emotionally. For example and individual may be a Melancholy in social interaction (mind), a Sanguine in the decision making area (will) and a Phlegmatic in deeper relationships (emotions)
  24. 24. Man attempts to meet his temperament needs Happiness in marriage is greatly dependent on how well each spouse understands their partners temperament and how willing they are to meet their partners temperament needs. The way a man perceives himself, his world and God will determine how he will behave. These perceptions are founded in the temperament. Therefore, on the basis of this premises, the temperament is the determining factor of what we are, but our environment and our relationship with God determine what we will become. Can we meet our needs in ways that please the Lord? Idealistic! Man has not been able to walk solely in the Spirit; sometimes he walks in the flesh. Just as the body is made of three parts, the temperament consists of three parts: inclusion(mind), control(will), affections(emotions). Our temperaments have weaknesses which cause problems in our social life, our marital life and our spiritual life.
  25. 25. Inclusion Evil thoughts and an evil eye are found in the inclusion area. Control Sins of pride, foolishness, andInclusion Control blasphemy are found in the control area. (mind) (will) Affection Adulteries, fornication and lasciviousness (lusting) are found in the affection area. Affections (emotions) * Wickedness, deceit, murder, thefts, and covetousness are a combination of two or more of the temperament needs of Inclusion, Control and Affection.
  26. 26. We call these perfections STRENGTHS.And when properly used, bring glory to God.“Seeing you have purified your soul in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brothers, see that you love one another with a pure heart fervently.” 1 Peter 1:22
  27. 27. To Bring God glory:Make up your mind to focus on the good and not the bad. (Inclusion)Decide to bend our will and through that strength, meet the needs of another person. (Control)Allow our emotions to reach out and give love and affection to another person, regardless of our own wants and needs. (Affection)
  28. 28. Email: coachdebbiekessler@gmail.comPhone: 770-307-7759Web: http://happymarriage4us.comFacebook: /coachdebbiekesslerTwitter: /Happymar4us