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Presentation at WebJam 9. A Tongue in Cheek look at Programming Languages

Presentation at WebJam 9. A Tongue in Cheek look at Programming Languages

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  • 1. THE CODE Gary Barber - Information Architect, User Interaction Designer radharc.com.au manwithnoblog.com WebJam9
  • 2. WebJam9
  • 3. WORKING-STORAGE SECTION. 77 WS-NAME-ERROR-FLAG 77 WS-NAME COPY NAMEW.COB. PROCEDURE DIVISION. PIC 9(01) COMP VALUE 0. PIC X(30) VALUE SPACES. Cobol 000000-CONTROL. PERFORM 000100-PROCESS-NAME THRU 000100-EXIT UNTIL (WS-NAME = quot;ENDquot;). 000000-EXIT. STOP RUN. 000100-PROCESS-NAME. DISPLAY quot; quot;. DISPLAY quot;ENTER NAME (UP TO 30 CHARACTERS)quot;. DISPLAY quot;123456789012345678901234567890 ('END' TO STOP)quot;. MOVE SPACES TO WS-NAME. ACCEPT WS-NAME. IF WS-NAME = quot;ENDquot; GO TO 000100-EXIT. MOVE WS-NAME TO NAW-NAME-WORK. PERFORM 006000-NAME-EDIT THRU 006000-EXIT IF (WS-NAME-ERROR-FLAG = 1) DISPLAY quot;NAME INVALIDquot; GO TO 000100-EXIT. MOVE WS-NAME TO NAW-NAME-WORK. PERFORM 006100-NAME-REVERSE THRU 006100-EXIT DISPLAY NAW-NAME-WORK. DISPLAY quot;LAST: quot; NAW-SPLIT-LAST. DISPLAY quot;FIRST: quot; NAW-SPLIT-FIRST. DISPLAY quot;PRE: quot; NAW-SPLIT-PRE. DISPLAY quot;POST: quot; NAW-SPLIT-POST. 000100-EXIT. EXIT. COPY NAMEP.COB. WebJam9
  • 4. HAI CAN HAS STDIO? I HAS A PET Lolcode GIMMEH PET, OBTW This is the beginning of a long comment block, or actually, quot;OBTWquot; was the beginning. And to end it... TLDR BOTH SAEM PET AN quot;CATquot;, O RLY? YA RLY,VISIBLE quot;JOO HAS A CATquot; NO WAI, VISIBLE quot;JOO NEEDS CATquot; OIC I HAS A VAR GIMMEH VAR IZ VAR BIGGER THAN 10? YARLY BTW this is true VISIBLE quot;BIG NUMBER!quot; NOWAI BTW this is false VISIBLE quot;LITTLE NUMBER!quot; KTHX KTHXBAI WebJam9
  • 5. Coldfusion <cfloop LIST = quot;#Server.Coldfusion.SupportedLocales#quot; index = quot;localequot; delimiters = quot;,quot;> <cfset oldlocale = SetLocale(quot;#locale#quot;)> <cfoutput><p>#locale#<br /> Local: #LSEuroCurrencyFormat(123456, quot;localquot;)#<br /> Currency Number: #LSParseEuroCurrency(quot;EUR123456quot;)#<br /> International: #LSEuroCurrencyFormat(123456, quot;internationalquot;)#<br /> None: #LSEuroCurrencyFormat(123456, quot;nonequot;)#<br /> <hr noshade> </p></cfoutput> </cfloop> WebJam9
  • 6. Ruby require 'rubygems' require 'httparty' class Ebay include HTTParty end begin item = Ebay.get('http://rorbuilder.info/cgi-bin/ebay.cgi)['ebay'] item.each do |key, value| puts key + ': ' + value end rescue p 'oops that product doesn't exist' end WebJam9
  • 7. WebJam9
  • 8. WebJam9
  • 9. F ingerversitive U niversial C ompiled K nowledge I ntegration T ranslator WebJam9
  • 10. 2 x 5 elements 11 = optiumal base5 WebJam9
  • 11. function() WebJam9
  • 12. pointer [x] WebJam9
  • 13. pointer.pink.hair [x] WebJam9
  • 14. loop() WebJam9
  • 15. loop.2() WebJam9
  • 16. loop.x() WebJam9
  • 17. loop.(oops) WebJam9
  • 18. flag.x = declare() WebJam9
  • 19. flag.x = .maybe. WebJam9
  • 20. flag.x = .wtf. WebJam9
  • 21. if(x is .true.) WebJam9
  • 22. case (this | that) WebJam9
  • 23. case (this only!) WebJam9
  • 24. blind.panic(!purplehair) WebJam9
  • 25. just.crazy(horns) WebJam9
  • 26. pray() WebJam9
  • 27. flip() WebJam9
  • 28. flip.2() WebJam9
  • 29. flip.2x() WebJam9
  • 30. flip.x() WebJam9
  • 31. HAPPY BIRTHDAY LACHLAN WebJam9